Oct 23, 2016


here's to my attempt to love every inch of life,

love every inch of it,
not just days filled with warmth,
not just the highs,
but the lows as well,
days filled with wrong choices
and days without any choices left and all you can do is to go through it all
to love the depth of darkness in life left unexplored,
deep deep down the spine.


you do feel like a sunset ; though
a blaze of color, 
orage, pearly pinks, vibrant purples....


how can you taste like late nights in the same time too?


you taste like sunshine

not quite ....

Here with you cause you got the right vibe
Seems like you probably got a dope mind
But it’s gotta be the right time
We're only good for the night time


Cause I’m a problem with problems, I know who I am and I’m not no good
You can have me tonight or never, I thought you understood
Baby some people are meant to be loved and others just make it
So take what I'm willing to give and love it or hate it


Don’t think because you’re with me this is real
Don’t stop what you're doing cause I like how you do it

zayn - wrong

Oct 16, 2016


17 used to be a mere number. Never a tad bit important to me. A number in passing, a number I always deliberately forget. Never once I thought it will be a number I look forward each month. But you make me like 17 the most ; putting it in the back of my mind. I wrote a lot of tacky stuffs about you here eventhough you almost never read it (pls jangan baca lagi) but if you read this, well here goes : you are worth shit ton of tacky stuffs because you constantly add colors to my gray-scale days. Happy 17, many more to come down the road!

just don't

I'm dizzy. It's two am in the morning but I'm here, writing my rambling thoughts thinking that if I don't I probably will be awake till the sun start to creep again. Sleeping feels like a chore nowadays; I can't bring my mind to just stop and chill. I guess it is both a blessing and a curse to feel everything at once; madly; deeply.

Oct 9, 2016

There is no way to make sense of things

Never understand how my brain works. It keeps telling me things that contradict with each other. Sometimes I want to go away from here, go away to some secret beaches and inhale the salty air and just feel the breeze slowly poke my cheeks. But sometimes I want to stay, enjoy the chaotic streets because in that chaos strangely enough I found me a wave of calmness. 

Most of the time though, I just want to inhale and exhale and probably cry a bit with coffee in my hand and cumming poems in the other one, accompanied with neruda and holden.

Because why not

Because I do now.

People said that very little is needed to make a happy life; I think it's true. You happen to be one of the variable that do.

Oct 6, 2016


You right there. Stop.